Monosyllabic Pedantry

Monday, November 28, 2005

The Rich are getting screwed

My guide to voting got me thinking about our "progressive" tax system. First of all, it's a good rule of thumb that if something is described with the words progressive, justice, or peoples, it's commie doublespeak for you're about to get screwed.
We currently have Karl Marx's version of a taxing system: From each according to their ability to each according to their need. One thing you constantly hear from the commies, and you know who you are, is that the world is so unfair. Let's add this up.
One of the foundations of our country is that we are all equal; we all get equal rights. If you think about it, we fund our government to protect our rights and make sure that everybody is treated the same. So why do some have to pay considerably more than others for the same rights? That doesn't seem fair at all. Now some of you will say that the rich have more rights than the poor. This is patently false according to the system, and that blindfolded chick with the scales and sword. Yes, there is some level of corruption in any system. While some people have a certain adulation for it, people of honor must strive to stomp it out. We don't achieve justice by accepting injustice.
It is in this vein that I feel that we should all pay the same taxes for the same rights. Not that pussy-footed same percentage, that's being bandied around. I mean the same dollar amount. Since the bottom 50% currently pay something like 4% of the taxes, the change will not be too extreme, once half the country kicks in a little something. If all those deadbeats each kicked in $50 a year, it would go a long way.
I can hear the folks on the left already. What about the poor that can't afford to pay even a little. I figure we have a couple of choices. Either they can work in the shock collar and handcart labor camps, or they can forfeit their protection by the state. That's not to say the state would do anything to them; it's just that if they get into a bar fight and get killed, nobody is arrested. Watch how fast they miraculously find the tax money.
The other road to the peoples' equal and fair justice system is progressive civil rights. This would be similar to the old feudal system. If you pay for the first class rights, you get to taser your gardener for bad service.

Personally, I prefer that we all have equal rights. Equal rights for equal pay.

12 Comments:

  • Dear Ebenezer,

    You've utterly convinced me: we should punish the poor for the sin of being poor. Poor people ARE poor because they suck and their lack of money is an unfair burden on the rich and powerful.

    I can't wait to get myself a gun and go around randomly shooting poor people in order to reduce the surplus population.

    Still, tell me, before I adopt your world-view. Does it hurt to lose your heart or is the process of drying out and turning to dust so gradual that one barely notices?

    Also, if my ancestors left Europe because they were poor and on the verge of death, should I write letters apologizing for my ancestors being an undue burden on those rich people? To whom should I address them? Should I offer to die in some state-exacerbated famine or do I just luck out by accident of birth?

    By Blogger Aunt B, at 7:44 PM  

  • I hadn't even considered the beneficial population aspects to my plan. Thanks, B

    Remember that you can only shoot those who don't pay anything. Also note that I prefer the labor camp option.

    Commies love to be generous with other peoples' money, then go on about how generous and compassionate they are.

    All death is certain.

    By Blogger Exador, at 5:15 AM  

  • Remember that you can only shoot those who don't pay anything.

    Oh, sure, now that you've had time to think about your position and realize that most everyone in America is poor by someone else's standards, you change the rules.

    Well, it's too late, buster; I've already invited Winfrey and Gates to play "Shoot the Poor," and, compared to them, you are a pauper.

    By Blogger Aunt B, at 6:15 AM  

  • I would think that, of all people, reading comprehension would be your strong suit.

    Or did you decide to major in drama after school?

    By Blogger Exador, at 6:23 AM  

  • And I would have thought that, as a Boy Scout, you'd be all about selfless service to your community.

    By Blogger Aunt B, at 6:56 AM  

  • Exador,
    I used to like you, but you have lost all my respect. Don't bash the thespians of the world, buster. They entertain your poor ass.

    Signed,
    The Divine Ms. B.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:50 AM  

  • Miss B!

    Holy shit! Fancy meeting you here. I'm not going to apologize for this Boy Scout's ungentlemanly behavior, but let me just say that, in my experience, sometimes, his ungentlemanly behavior is a lot more fun than insulting.

    By Blogger Aunt B, at 10:35 AM  

  • Divine Ms B,

    I'd believe you, but if you're an actress, who could tell?

    Might I remind you, Aunt B, the the Boy Scout Moniker is your making, not mine.

    By Blogger Exador, at 10:43 AM  

  • True. I suppose if we'd had a third night out on the town, I would have realized that you're more a feudalist than a boy scout. But I've given you a nickname and now you're stuck with it until I get bored with it.

    If I want to understand your personal philosophy, would I be better off studying Camelot or Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Or just laying around pretending like I'm dying of the plague?

    By Blogger Aunt B, at 10:55 AM  

  • Hey, if you are going to get a gun and start randomly shooting poor people in order to reduce the surplus population, can you start at the Wal-Mart in West Nashville?
    That sure would help me out.

    By Anonymous Sarcastro, at 11:03 AM  

  • If we had a third night out on the town, I might have cured you of your feminism.


    Just 'cause a watery tart throws a scimitar at you, that's no basis for government.

    By Blogger Exador, at 1:28 PM  

  • I doubt it. I refuse to take any cure from someone who won't come to my bedside to administer it.

    By Blogger Aunt B, at 1:38 PM  

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