Monosyllabic Pedantry

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Look for the Future Vandalism

I was about to change the oil on Mrs Schwartz' jeep when three teenage boys climbed over my chainlink fence and cut through my front yard. When the first two saw me, they did what any reasonable kid would do; they had an "oh shit" expression, and quickly walked away. The third, older and bigger kid saw me and gave more of a "what are you gonna do" look. So I said to none of them in particular, "Hey, how about not jumping my damn fence?"

They made it across the street from my yard, and the one kid loudly started in.
"Fuck that punk. I'll jump whatever fuckin fence I want. He can fuck himself."

The fence, I don't really care about, but I'm not going to have some punk talk like that to me in my own yard. So I went over and explained it to him. I was loud. I was mad. One of the smaller kids apologized and I thanked him. It shut the bigger one up long enough to get some distance away, before they all started talking smack. "Fuck you, nigger!" Coming from three young black kids, to the whitest guy in the neighborhood. Explain that one to me.

So I did what I've been planning to do for some time: Added a couple of extra motion sensors with a wireless receiver to the front yard. Just for fun, I also ordered a fake security camera.

Sure, it would have been cheaper and less trouble to just take it, but fuck that.

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  • How about some fire, Scarecrow?

    For fifty bucks, buy a car battery and get some juice running through your chain links.

    Just enough for him to know you aren't the kind of nigger he can fuck with.

    By Blogger Sarcastro, at 5:46 PM  

  • Black kids called you a nigger? Wow.......

    By Blogger rockygrace, at 10:52 AM  

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