Another Rant againt Primates

Mrs Schwartz has had spiedies marinating since Thursday. Today is the day we are grilling them. Beer goes great with spiedies. I would like nothing more than to have a cold beer with my spiedies.
Unfortunately, this state is populated by unevolved bible thumping troglodytes, so we can't buy any beer to have with our spiedies, because that would make their sky-daddy angry. I can't believe these monkeys get the same vote I do.
I have become a single-issue voter. I would vote for Hitler if he promised to allow Sunday beer sales. I actually voted democrat last election, just to vote against that Prick, David Shafer.