Monosyllabic Pedantry

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Freak Accident

The freakiest freak accident happened to Mrs Shwartz. Something similar has happened twice before. She gets Montgomery all excited about going for a walk. He jumps up and down like a maniac. She leans down, usually to put his leash on him. He headbutts her, generally knocking her unconscious.

The freak part this time around?

She was attempting to spray her prescription nasal spray up her nose at the moment Montgomery nailed her. This nasal spray has an especially long nozzle. Montgomery jammed this thing up her nose so far and so hard, that it tore a hole in her septum. You can't make shit like this up. She went to an Ear, Nose and Throat specialist today. She is going to have to have surgery to repair the hole. They are going to have to do a skin graft, all inside her head. She told me the doctor has big hands and he told her the hole is bigger than the width of his pinky finger. Since a specialist is going to have to do the surgery, she is not going to be able to get it done until Dec 23rd, at the earliest.


  • That really sucks.

    I'm guessing you all aren't making the Death March Thru Bingo this year, then.

    By Anonymous Sarcastro, at 7:45 AM  

  • No way. We weren't really planning on doing it anyway, but now she might have her surgery on the 23rd, so definitely no.

    By Blogger Exador, at 10:01 AM  

  • What is her pain level now? And how does this affect a person. I'm sure it hurts like hell. But is it causing breathing problems or what is going on with that?

    By Anonymous Sarcastro, at 1:35 PM  

  • No breathing problems, just extreme pain.

    By Blogger Exador, at 7:58 AM  

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