Monosyllabic Pedantry

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Drinking for others

I'm in the shower yesterday, when Mrs Schwartz comes in.

Mrs S: Mike called, and he sounds like he's in trouble. Call him right now. He said he's at Bogey's (local bar) and I think he's depressed or something.

So I call my friend.

Exador: Hey! What's going on? Where are you?
Mike: I'm drunk. (long pause) Where are you?
Exador: Are you at Bogey's?
Mike: I've been to Bogey's five or six times. (By the way, this is his regular bar, that he's been to thousands of times)
Exador: Are you there now?

Line goes dead.

So, with Mrs S prodding me with a stick all the way out the door, I drive to the bar and find my friend. Yes, he was drunk. No, he wasn't depressed. It was his first night off of work in a few weeks and he was celebrating. So we stayed there until about 11.

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Sunday, May 25, 2008

Memorial Day

Not being a veteran, I have little to add to the comments concerning the sacrifices made by our armed forces, save this:

What always struck me when watching Band of Brothers, was the interviews with the actual veterans. These men, who were undoubtedly hardened men, these men would break down and cry telling their stories 60 years after they happened.

60 years later, and they still couldn't tell their story out loud.

To me, that says everything.

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Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Governor Perdue, You're a Jackass

Gov. Sonny Perdue is giving some Georgians a gas tax break: farmers and timber officials.

Perdue announced the executive order Monday suspending fuel taxes on dyed fuel oil used by off-road vehicles in farming and timber growing and harvesting.
The suspension will continue in effect at least until the General Assembly meets again in January.

Oh, by the way, Perdue owns a Houston County agribusiness company.

Fuckhead.

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Monday, May 12, 2008

We should all take public transportation


Crazy Subway Girl (with subtitles) - Watch more free videos

You meet the most interesting people.

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Everybody has their limits


Yesterday, we took the girls down to Atlanta for a day at Piedmont park. They had a great time. It was a perfect, sunny day. Mrs Schwartz beamed like a new mom. They had more fun just walking around the park, than being in the "dog park" section of the park. Especially for Susan, they are too young for that many, larger dogs. We ended up picking her up and carrying her out. Janet had a ball.
After a full day in the sun, we went to a bar in Little 5 points that allows dogs on the outdoor patio. As we sat there, a little girl came over to pet the puppies. We encourage interaction because we want to socialize them.
So girl is practically joining us for lunch. She's sitting with us, she's climbing under the table.
Her parents called her back over, but she returned a short time later with a baseball cap in her hand. While she was petting Susan, she put the baseball cap on Susan's head, effectively covering her whole head. I heard her make a low growl under the cap. The little girl took off the hat and everything seemed ok.
Then the girl returned a third time. In hind sight, I did notice Susan looking at her a little wierd. Like she was a little scared, but it didn't register at the time, besides, Susan has never been anything but a big love-sponge wuss.
When the girl reached for her, Susan let out one of those bark/growl/snaps that say "I'm tired of your shit. Get the fuck away from me" We all jumped. The little girl jumped back, startled. Her parents called her back over to their table. We talked with the mom as they were leaving a few minutes later. Everybody seemed to be on the same page. The dog is tired, and 'grumpy'. The woman said her dog does the same thing when it's tired. That was nice of her.

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Friday, May 09, 2008

Toyota Maintenace

I was driving to work this morning when my "MAINT REQ'D" light came on. I'm old enough to have grown up with the "OIL" light being the primary dashboard light. When your "OIL" light came on, that meant you had seconds to get your engine stopped before doing serious damage. Take your time, and your engine will seaze up. So when a light come on, I have that brainwashed feeling of panic that it's important. With my Nissan, I learned that the "CHK ENG" light typically meant that the O2 sensor was whacky because I had not tightened the gas cap enough.
Immediately after seeing the "MAINT REQ'D" light, I noticed that my odometer was reading exactly 5000 miles. That told me that this was probably some stupid maintenance thing.
Sure enough, I do a web search and there are a zillion hits on how to turn this stupid light off. It turns out that you are supposed to reset it after an oil change, so that it will remind you to do the next oil change. Apparently the non-dealer garage that I had my oil change done at, is not familiar with this feature.

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Thursday, May 08, 2008

And you people think I'm mean

My conversation yesterday:

Mystery person: So what? Now We're sending food to Myanmar?!
Exador: Yeah they had a cyclone.
Mystery person: Was it a regular cyclone or a super cyclone.
Exador: A super cyclone, i guess. I'm hearing repports of 60,000 people dead.
Mystery person: So eat them.

News report showing footage from helicopter, showing bodies lying everywhere.

Mystery person: See? Tons of food.

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Thursday, May 01, 2008

Priorities

Mothers Against Drunk Driving, yes, those harpies that brought us road blocks and 0.08 bac, are out there bitching about the video game Grand Theft Auto because, get this, there's drunk driving shown in the game!
First of all, the name of the game is GRAND THEFT AUTO.
I've never played this game, but from what I understand, there's a great deal of actions in it that would get you to a lower circle of hell than driving tipsy.
Like Murder. Lots and lots of murder.
Isn't there also theft, prostitution, pimping, assault, graphic sex (if you get the add-on).

If you can find a better example of a what a bunch of shrill ninnies MADD is, and how they've turn DUI into a religious jihad, I'd like to hear it.

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